Helpful tips to combat loneliness this Christmas
The festive season is mostly thought of as a time of joy, celebrations and love - but for far too many in Scotland, it can be a time of loneliness.
38% of Scottish adults admit to feeling lonely, and Christmas can exacerbate these feelings for those who live far from their families, may be working over Christmas, or dread going to parties and celebrations without a partner, and so end up staying at home. You might even feel lonely in a room full of people - sadly, it’s more common than you think.
We asked Hood readers who experience feelings of loneliness over the holidays for their top tips to make the most of the festivities and see the joy in solitude, to help you treasure your time alone this Christmas.
Identify your trigger times and plan around these accordingly
Everyone has particular times where feelings of loneliness can hit hardest, and this time of year can be particularly difficult.
Alison, a divorced mum-of-two, will be on her own this Christmas as it is her ex-partner’s turn to have the children. “2017 was so hard without the boys, so this year I have planned things to do in advance. I’ll be having cocktails with friends on Christmas Eve, and on Christmas Day, I’m joining a couple of other mums who are in a similar situation to me, for a walk with our dogs and lunch out. It won’t be the same as a family Christmas but it will, hopefully, still be enjoyable.”
Be kind to yourself
This may not completely erase feelings of loneliness but taking special care of yourself can help you to feel a little better.
Caroline, a widow, has a festive self-care plan in place to help her tackle feeling alone over the festive season. “I know I’ll be feeling sad and incredibly lonely this Christmas, but I have bought myself a couple of books I’ve been wanting to read, scented candles and some luxurious bathtime treats. I plan on making myself my favourite food and having a bit of a pamper day – this will take my focus off feeling alone.”
GIve to others
When you’re feeling lonely and vulnerable, putting yourself ‘out there’ can often feel like the last thing you’d want to do - but that’s exactly how Siobhan tackles her feelings of loneliness. “I’ve been single my whole life and my only brother now lives in California. So, every Christmas Eve, Christmas Day and Boxing Day I volunteer at a soup kitchen. Helping others, who need it more than I do, gives me a real sense of purpose and joy.”
Get outside
The days are short and can be grey, which can leave even the most chipper of us feeling blue.
Pauline, whose only daughter works over Christmas, advises wrapping up and getting out to beat the winter blues. "I download a chatty podcast and head out no matter the weather. Listening gives you all the benefits of company, without the hard work, plus I squeeze in some exercise too which gets those endorphins going. I view my time alone as a luxury, a time to be selfish and indulge my own wants without having to consider anybody else.”
Try online
Did you know there are now apps and online platforms where you can meet likeminded individuals who are looking for friendship? Log on to Bumble BFF, download the Friender app or have a sneak peek at Meetup.com to connect with new people in your area.
Jane explains, “I had tried and failed at online dating so was a bit sceptical about friendship apps. But, I figured I had nothing to lose and a girl gang to gain. It takes a bit of courage to go along to your first couple of events but everyone is in the same situation so it’s easy to get chatting and suss out others who share your vibe. I’m hosting Christmas Day for a bunch of my Bumble mates and can’t wait!”